Wise Wild Woman

Years ago, on Saltspring Island, a trippy little enclave of sanity surrounded by water, I took a 5 year hiatus from chaos and lived a wild woman, wise woman life. I had lovely weekend workshops with amazing and inspirational women who taught me all about the wise woman way of seeking different means than mainstream in which to live my life. Fast forward almost 20 years to a 55 year old woman in distress. I have no children any longer, I am fresh out of a relationship where my spouse's dishonesty broke our love into pieces and I spent a dicey 5 weeks as I sought to get my feet under me.

This is the resolution part of that episode of my life.

Wise Wild Woman

I find myself in that place where I have no responsibilities and no structure. There are no definites these days and my plans are nebulous at best. I have people well intentions and not so much who suggest routines, I anticipate returning to them soon, but for now, I am on the loose.

As an ex-wife, ex-mom, ex-student, I am in that enviable place in my life where magic is afoot and big changes are in the process of occurring. To some, I am sure, I am thought of as being out of control, but for the immediate moment, I am happy just the way things are, and just the way I am.

The wild woman uses her wheels like a rolling support vehicle. It is loaded with all the necessary accoutrements of daily life, and also, camping gear, bedding, assorted snackage that doesn't need refrigeration as well as a full office suite - cell phone, laptop, digital camera and all the supporting cordage and tripodage. Like a Girl Guide, I am prepared for any eventuality I can possibly anticipate and ready to greet it with grace.

This wild woman is NOT a martyr and she does NOT suffer. I have my hair done, keep an immaculate manicure and skin care regimen and dress as well as any woman with a home. Unlike the woman with the home however, I also know where the nearest wifi is, wherever I may drift, where the good public bathrooms are and last but not least, where the best parking spots are for Vancouver Island wild wise women. Scenery is a must, the vaster, the more breathtaking the better.

Parking spots for wild women have intense criteria. They need to either be deep in the shady forest, on the shoulder of a sparsely traveled road, but that has access to wifi for my nefarious wild woman dealings. Or the perfect parking spot should be in a solitary seaside position where no other signs of human life are nearby.

Here, I will write, draw, communicate with supportive allies near and far, rest, read, listen to podcasts or watch tv shows on my netbook. I walk, take photos, videos, upload them, blog, eat, relax, sing, doze and sometimes when it all catches up to me, I sob, I cry, I pray or I scream my bloody head off. Get it out is my motto. Wild women don't need all that angst locked up inside.

The way I look at it is, this wild woman's breeding days are over. I am no longer sought as a sexual liason. Life is way less complicated, especially now that my husband has given up on us and cast me free. I am invisible to our culture now. An old woman who is seemingly purposeless. In the grand scheme of things, I have no assets, no worth, no financial value, hence, I don't have much of a vote with the meagre dollars I do spend.

Let it be known that for this six foot amazon to be invisible is just where I want to be. I am happy to not exist to the powers that be - making a minimum visible means of support and then building my goddesscracy underground.

Who expects a homeless woman to be a societal catalyst?

Works for me.

*Note- Since this was written, I have found a lovely sanctuary that I can function comfortably out of. Goddess bless! I give thanks to my Creator for hearing my cries and dreams and helping me resourceress my way out of the dark and back into a light where life is much more conducive to being my wise, wild woman self.